I feel like my blog has come a full circle lately. I started blogging in 2007 because I had decided to get fit, and wanted to create myself an online log of my progress. In fact, that was the birth of a following and the start of a massive journey that took me to many exciting places that I would never have dreamed of.
So why do I think I’m back there again today? Because, quite frankly my last 18 months has been frightful, and it’s time I completed my ‘get myself back’ journey with the last massive hurdle: body composition.
Here is a summary of my last 18 months, to put you in the picture, put this in context, so to speak:
All the things in the list above are facts. I am not being deliberately pessimistic, I am being factual.
I have struggled with my relatively recent diagnosis for the last few months. I am finally on top of things now. There seems to be a stigma attached in some people’s minds but in reality, it’s something than can befall anyone. In fact, depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain. It does strange things to your outlook. I actually managed to convince myself that the world would be better off without me. That is why I can empathise with Robin Williams. Truth be told, that is not a nice place to be in, at all.
I should have expected it, looking at the list above. I think, in all honesty, I struggled most with my mother’s sudden death. She was diagnosed with stomach cancer 4 days after I moved away from England. She didn’t tell me for 6 weeks, until my husband joined me in New Zealand. She died two weeks later, the day my plane left NZ to take me back to England to visit her. It had been an emergency booking. I was too late. She was only 67. It wasn’t fair at all. Only 2 months before I was waving goodbye promising to visit her the following summer.
That, with everything else that I had to deal with added on, put me in that place.
That’s the past. It’s done. I am winning now. I chose to make some major life changing things to get me back again. The major one was to quit teaching. It has given me balance back, given me time to do all the things that I had given back, given me time to be happy, precious time for my family. I decided that money cannot possibly buy you happiness. I am now a lot happier, but also a lot poorer. The latter doesn’t matter at all.
I am retraining, have completed a coaching qualification and have almost completed a personal trainer qualification. I also have a few other job ideas and offers in the pipeline. I am doing things that make me happy.
There is one more thing, though, that I have been choosing to ignore until today, though. My diet. And by that I mean the things that I eat, rather than a weight loss programme.
Like many others, I’m sure, I have neglected the balanced healthy eating that I practiced while I was an athlete. I comfort ate (and drank) and nevertheless have now got some added body fat that I do not want, or need. We have made a pact in our house: stop being lazy and cook / eat properly.
So, that means I now have some new year’s goals
Continue to make life choices that are happiness motivated.
Regain healthy eating balance.
Get back to my goal weight again.
I have taken a before photo. I also stood on the scales, for the first time in 18 months. The last time round I had a different problem: I hadn’t every done a stitch of exercise in my life and had a lot of excess body fat, plus was very unfit. This time, I am fit, I just have a bit more baggage than I should have!
I will blog my journey, as I regain the rest of myself, in the visual sense. That will complete my happiness bubble, inside and out. I might share the before and after photos at the end. I will detail my progress, how I change my heating habits, recipes I use, changes it make, and so on. Come with me, make the change for yourself too.
Join me, follow me, be inspired by me.
This time, I strive for happiness, health and fitness. Nothing more, nothing less. This is the last step, in my regain happiness journey.
Now, let’s begin!